Cosmopolitan: August Edition

Dear Cosmo,

Can you please change? I wasn't feeling this month's issue at all...
Can you be anymore redundant?

Used- to- be- Love,
The Disbeliever

Miss Kim Kardashian is on the cover? What does this girl do?
Why is she every guy's dream? I don't know...
She is pretty, but work out your ass.

I had a lot of wants this issue: I want a gold 14k style dress (just like Miss Taylor Swift in her Covergirl ad), Lancome Paris makeup eye shadow, Nike Lunarlon running kicks, Maybelline falsies mascara, Crackle nai lpolish... Ok.. I'm off track this is not guy related. They definitely did a great job selling products this issue. That's about it though. The articles stunk!

Some highlights are: "How Old Should You Be When You Get Married" (p. 40) Woman should hold off until their late 20s. The reason for this is because it gives you more time to learn about yourself. Um, makes sense to me... I'm mid-20s now men haha.. Just so y'all are aware of my situation.

"Being Buds with Your Ex" (p. 45) Yeah it ended, but you and your former fling shared pretty key moments.Why not bury the hatchet and hang out? I cannot bury the hatchet if it is still in my ex's back. Haha just kidding. I don't understand why this magazine is saying to hang out with an ex. Time is limited! Why waste time on something that already didn't work out for whatever reason?

"How Kim Stays On Top" (p. 46) Kim Kardashian's article. I read it. Didn't pull anything good out of it. Can I have my five minutes back? The only good thing about this article is the title.

"The Sexy Confidence Guys Love" (p.53) Good old Justin Timberlake. What does this man want? He wants"

• Don't give a Damn- He likes a woman who doesn't personally care if others like her
• Tell an X-Rated Joke- Nothing better than a pretty girl with a nasty mouth
• Know Your Style- Wear what feels best for you
• Try Anything Once- Don't shut anything down without considering it
• Let Him Do All the Work- Enjoy the experience of what's happening now, instead of planning what is yet to come
• Own your Emotions- Guts to say exactly how you feel
• Be a Babe Among Boys- Hang with the guys. Don't try to be one
• Call Him Out- Calmly explain if he messes up in your relationship

Thanks for the good advice JT. Call me anytime day or night. I'm what your looking for haha...

36% of men say they are more attracted to a woman if she is using an IPad. (p. 68) EWWWWW!

"A Cosmo App for Your Guy" (p. 69) How many guys would really get this? Ever wish your BF or husband had the magical ability to know exactly what you want? Guess what! It's not going to happen so just tell him. A Cosmo App will not solve this issue.

"Do you notice if your girlfriend could use a pedi?" (p. 84) 80% YES!So go for those pedicures ladies.  

"Guys Rate 50 Sex Moves" (p. 110) Figure it out already! Geez.

"Are You Texting Him to Death"  (p. 118) Answer is yes! Just text him to mainly to send across a quick message. Anything else is an overkill! A quick sorry if you f-ed up. "I'm sorry, let's talk tonight." If you guys are at work, text for tonight's plans. Or after spending three nights together and all of a sudden you're apart. Text to show you're thinking of him.

I love the stories Cosmo writes.Whether it would be about surviving a rape, some type of attack or this months

"Being forced into being a sex slave" (p. 161). It is definitely sad stuff, but interesting. At least I feel like I'm expanding my mind a little bit from reading it. I always turn here first when the magazine arrives.  

  
 "Invasion of the Redheads" (p 166) I did dye my hair red for the 4th of July. I didn't get the idea from this magazine. I thought of it all by myself. I liked my red hair. My mother wanted to disown me from the family. Mostly postive feedback. A few negatives. According to Cosmo, if you want people to notice you, go red. According to Disbeliever, if you want redheads to notice you go red. Redheads are not my thing unless your name is Garret. Haha. Shoutout to Garret. I think he is the only attractive red-headed guy I've ever. Conan O'Brien has a hot factor as well. I think it is just because he is so freaken funny. Men are attracted to people who stand out. If you believe redheads are unique, sexy, and fearless the odds are you will become more of a hot-blooded man magnet. I enjoyed the change while the 28 washes lasted.

That pretty much sums up this months. As you can tell I wasn't into the magazine at all. Maybe I'm outgrowing it! Ahhh should I now read "Time"?

<3 Disbeliever disbelieving 24/7