"Boy, I ain't being your MA"

I just had a similar experience to Miss Realist.
The guy wants to "chill."
He is a Facebooker who moved onto to be a Blackberry add. I hate it when guys mention your body before even meeting you.
This is a major red flag for just a booty call situation. I'm definitely not looking for that type of headache.
Keep your mouth shut if you are a Facebooker trying to pick up a girl!

Do not say:
1. "Ma" your body is slamming.
2. "Ma" you would look good in lingerie.
3. "Ma" you would look good as a sexy Santa.
4. "Ma" you would look good as a sexy elf.
5. "Ma" I'm a freak.
6. "Ma" send me some pics.
7. "Ma" what kind of underwear are you in?

Boy, check yourself before you wreck yourself! "I ain't your MA!"

<3 "K" the disbeliver disbelieving 24/7

The Hornballs of Facebook

I have come across many hornballs on Facebook. Some of these people I have not talked to in years…or we’ve never met! They see a hot picture of me and then start secret messaging me about wanting to hang out. I am not that stupid to realize that this is a request to hook up.

Take this guy for instance: Hornball. He added me through one of my friends. My friend has never met Hornball by the way. Here is his message (edited to perfection because he can’t spell—turn off!):

What's up (my name)? Nice to meet you. I'm Hornball. I found you on your friend’s pics. I'm glad you like my body because I love your legs ;). I just wish I would have found you back then so by now I would have already seen that cute smile and gorgeous legs in person ;-)

At first I was excited. He is my age and we both love to work out. Numerous messages later, he asked for my number. Weeks went by of him pestering me to hang out, but I was very busy. Just when I finally had some free time to hang out, I looked at his page and it was full of girls with big butts and boobs. He even left comments about their sexy legs, which is what he commented on my picture. Here is our conversation via text:

Hornball: Heyy sexy (my name). What’s up?
(Two hours later.)

Realist: Just got back from running. You?

Hornball: Nothing much. Just finishing up a leg workout. How have you been?
Realist: Busy!
Hornball: Aw when do you get some free time so we can finally chill?
Realist: Friday.
Hornball: Nice J I’ll hit you up.
Realist: You can hit me up, but you can’t hook up FYI.
Hornball: What do you mean?
Realist: Meaning no hooking up. I am just putting it out there because I am too old for silly business.
Hornball: Why so closed-minded? I wasn’t planning on hooking up when we chill but I like to play things by ear. MEANING THAT ANYTHING GOES. Life’s too short to not enjoy it and have fun.
Realist: I am just being straight up because guys are hornballs.
Hornball: If I were a hornball, then I would try to get in your pants the first or second time we chill. WHAT ABOUT THE THIRD? I’m not trying to get ass from you, but you should let things happen by themselves instead of putting up a wall when we haven’t even met. WELL I NAMED YOU A HORNBALL, SO YOU ARE A HORNBALL!
Realist: If I were to let things happen like that, I’d have a kid by now.
Hornball: Nah if anything happens we’ll wear protection, but I don’t like planning things or saying no to things before even meeting the person. I’m not trying to hit it and quit it or use you by any means, but I’m attracted to you and I love your legs.
Realist: Oh my goodness well I’m planning that we don’t hookup. That’s the only plan that I have. You can look at my legs, but no touchie.
Hornball: Lol stop you’re such a tease. No touchie on the first date, but maybe eventually. J
Realist: Noo I don’t want a relationship or FWB either!
Hornball: You’re killing me. L I AM HOPING THAT HE IS MAD NOW.
Realist: So do you still want to hang and not bang? 
Hornball: Yeah because eventually you’ll change your mind. J DANG IT!
Realist: Nooo I won’t. Trust me!
Hornball: Don’t say that lol you will. :p Those legs are too sexy to not be wrapped around me.
Realist: You know that you are making me more likely to run away from you with your hornball ways.
Hornball: Lol OK OK. I was just messing with you. Let’s just be friends first and then see what happens.
Realist: Let’s just be friends. J
Hornball: We’ll seeeee haha ;) So where do you want to go Friday?
Realist: Starbucks. (It’s the ultimate date place).
Hornball: OK Starbucks and movies?
Realist: That’s such a date.
Hornball: No lol friends go to movies together.
Realist: OK friend.
Hornball: OK girl friend, lol jk.
Realist: If you made girl friend one word, then you would be in trouble!
Hornball: In trouble, how?
Realist: I would defriend you.
Hornball: Damn you don’t play lol.
Realist: Nope! I don’t play games.
Hornball: Looking forward to seeing you.
Realist: Same here. I think haha.

Does this sound familiar? Clearly, he wants to hook up. Is Facebook the new speed dating? You can learn everything about the person in five minutes just by reading their page.

Our date was canceled because I had work. He wants to hang out Sunday, but I have no interest in him and I do not want to waste my time—even for the good of the blog (which is very rare). I am going to tell him that I am turned off by the fact that he adds so many girls and comments on their pictures with the same crap that he says to me. I am just one of the 826 girls that he has added. I bet he is also hooking up with them. I am taking myself out of the pool and throwing in the towel.

Keepin’ it real,

     Realist

Hey Cheapo!

I'm not your after thought!
Do NOT call me at 1:30 am in the morning ever!!
Plus throwing your drunk retarded friend on the phone for an added bonus. PLEASE~ I don't care if it is prime weekend time!!!

Call someone else for your booty call because you are not worth my time...

<3 "K" the disbeliver disbelieving 24/7

I'm NOT a gold digger! Your ass is just cheap!

So I took a blog hiatus for a bit, but I'm back in full force.

Congrats to (insert your name here). You made the blog!
First of all, never tell a guy you're "seeing", "chillen with", "kicking it to", "dating", or "hanging out with" that you have a dating blog.
They become super paranoid.

So we met at Shannon Rose. He impressed me because apparently he met me before and remembered every single detail. He also impressed me that for our first hang out we went RUNNING. I <3 me a runner. We then chilled after our run that night at this really happening new bar he introduced me to.
Yada... Yada...Yada.... So then our next hang out was at Starbucks. He paid with a giftcard. Which is questionable, but whatever. I picked up on the 46 cents that the giftcard did not cover!!!! Then we went for drinks later during that week. He accepts the 10 bucks I put in for the $15 bill!

So why is this guy calling me a gold digger?

As far as I'm concerned we are EVEN Steven!!! He paid more at Starbucks. I paid more for the drinks. I am totally an independent woman in that I make my own. I bought everything I own from my education, to my car, and the clothes on my back..and so on you get the point. In the near future I'll buying my OWN condo and living solo at this rate because dating sucks!

I feel guys lost the idea when it comes to dating. Yes, I make my own money, but it is still nice to be taken on a date once in a while. Whatever happened to that? Even if it is just to the freaken movies!

So when you wonder why you haven't been hearing from me, that is my answer.
I'm not a gold digger and my dog is not the ulimate cock block!

<3 "K" the disbeliver disbelieving 24/7

Who’s down with OMC? Yeah you know me!

    We are so glad to have joined a local running club, A.K.A. Old Man Club. We were recruited last month by one of the captains. Joining a running club sounded like a great way to meet men (not boys). We certainly did! ;) But, they are too old for us (20-25 years older). Boy, are they manly though!

There were three men in particular who had us mesmerized. We danced with all three. All we can say is “wow!” We have never found any men in their 40’s attractive. I wish the old men that I always attract looked like these guys!

Each guy had their own unique “hotness factor.” One is such a good dancer that he has his own Facebook fan page dedicated to his dancing! I didn’t know it at the time, but I first saw this sexy man at a half marathon dancing without a shirt and I was just amazed at his body and his moves! It just so happens that he is on our team! No matter how cold it is, he never wears a T-shirt during races! He’s just that hot. At the end of the night, we got digits from another guy and he wants to hang out with us! ;) We have never hung out with a hot, older man. We don’t usually hunt after them, but for the good of the blog, we will hang out.

I do not know if I would ever date a guy 10 years older than me, let alone 20. The plusses are that they are mature, stable, and are secure. I do not know anything about the dating dynamics of older men though.

A smart way for single people to mingle is to join a special interest club. There already have something in common! In fact, most of the people in our running club are single…and a few of them have met their now spouses!  What a fairytale!  

Coming into this club, we both thought that there would be some youngens. Unfortunately, there are like four other people around our age (not including us). Apparently, we joined at the wrong age because there is only one guy our age. If only we were older… We need to recruit!

I wonder if we will meet our next boyfriend at this running club. If we are still single at age 30 or 40, we know where to go!

Has anyone dated older men? Would you consider it?

      Keepin’ it real,

         Realist