On the other hand....

The Great Dane and I have been trying to find time to catch up on Skype, but with a 6-hour time difference, that's been tricky. So he just up and called me tonight. Who does that? From around the world?

I don't know what it is about this guy. I'm so drawn to him. He's smart and very laid back, and easy to talk to. And we had that one incredibly romantic evening in New York. *sigh*

Turns out, he might have secured a gig in Los Angeles, so he might be moving to the states! 

The practical part of me says, "stop this--if something happens, fine, but you can't wait around for a small chance. Date other guys! Forget this one!" But the romantic dreamer in me can't help but daydream about it. I would visit him in LA.....

I'm not holding out hope. But I will take the next five minutes to daydream.

Trying to stay positive,
Skeptic

Fool me once, shame on you. Fool me twice, shame on me.

So, let's recap what's been going on with the Journalist, shall we?

Journalist had a very obvious giant crush on me (constantly flirting with me at work). We started having lunches together. Just as I was wondering if the guy would ever ask me out, he told me about a date he went on. Flabbergasted, I decided that planted him firmly in friend territory. I will not pursue--he must make a move if he wants more.

So we became work buddies (or work "spouses," if you like that term). Some time went by and his flirting increased. I again began to wonder what was really going on. A trusted guy friend suggested that maybe before when he told me about his date, he was actually pretty shy and that was his (clumsy) way of telling me he was available. Huh. I thought that possibility might be true, but before I even did anything about it, the Journalist actually asked me out. Well, he asked if I'd want to hang out outside of work. Whatever that is.

So we went out to a museum. Was it a date? I don't know.

Which brings us to today. We were chatting and he shared that he's been having a bad week, because of this and that, and he recently broke up with a girl he's been seeing.

UGH.

Now I feel like a complete fool. Maybe it still is true that he does/did have a crush on me, but that being the case, it would seem he's a guy to keep girls on the hook to date them the next time things don't go well. It's kind of a lame player move, honestly. Time to find a new guy. I've had enough of this stupid confusing shit.

Trying to stay positive,
Skeptic

You've got a friend in me....

Date(?) with the Journalist on Saturday.

It's weird that I'm still not exactly sure if it was a date. On the one hand, it had many signs of a date--spending time together outside of work, on a Saturday, going to a museum and playfully chatting about all the contents therein, etc. It's actually a fantastic idea for a date--you get to see cool stuff, you never really run out of things to talk about because you can just keep talking about the stuff you see, and you can really get to know someone by what they share with you and what they think about the stuff.

On the other hand, he ended our day together with a hug.

Hmm.

All in all, I had a good time. He is very easy to talk to, and very intelligent. One of the exhibits we toured was of Spanish-American home art, and I giggled when he translated the Spanish for me (my Spanish may be a little rusty now, but I did minor in it--shh don't tell him just yet), but I still let him do it. I think it gave him a little boost. The chemistry is somewhat a question mark right now. I admit I was a little curious about what it would be like to kiss him, and I wondered if we ended up in a quiet corner of the museum if he might go for the opportunity (he didn't). But I wasn't thinking about kissing him the entire date (don't judge, but sometimes that is the case on dates). In my experience, that curiosity is enough, and can definitely grow to much more once a relationship develops. But it was a little tricky to see things in a romantic light when the entire date was so G-rated. I would like to go out with him again and see if there is any romance there. It just isn't coming naturally--maybe because we've had so many work lunches?

I can be a bit of a slow mover sometimes, but I think I have met my match on that note with this guy. A part of me likes to take this slow, because I'm not sure I'm actually ready to dive into a relationship after one date (and is anyone ever? maybe this is more natural pace--a relationship is, after all, more than lust). But another part of me wants to at least know in the smallest way if there's any romantic potential here before I invest too much time.

Trying to stay positive,
Skeptic

I hate games. I don't like Monopoly, either.

So the Journalist and I have exchanged numbers and emails, and have been trying to arrange a time/date and activity for our first date. Well, I assume it's a date.

I'm currently stuck in the place where I have a cell phone like most people that gives me email, so I know right away when he emails me (or texts). And I really do not believe in rules or games, because if he really is the right guy for me he won't care when I get back to him (and if we got married, looking back, details like that won't matter). BUT. There's still this little voice in side me that says, "don't write back right away! Let him sweat it out for a little while!" I HATE that voice. I HATE games/rules. It's shit like this that's why I hate dating--I'd rather skip all this bullshit horse and pony show and just get to dating someone seriously and regularly. You know that cozy place where you know you're going to see each other every weekend and it's all cuddly and happy. Can I just skip to that?

Anyway, if we ever get this stuff figured out, I might have a date this weekend. Will be very interesting to see how this goes! Long time in the making (about 4 months, but who's counting?).

Trying to stay positive,
Skeptic

"Is your husband or boyfriend a runner?"

Remember me? Realist here checkin’ in with the remix.

There is a lot on my soundtrack. Crazy stories that I would love to blog, but it would take me a lifetime to write everything.

I should be on a dating reality show with all the stuff that I attract. I am writing about this one because I value the opinion of my readers.

As I was walking to the gym, I realized I had left my water bottle in my car. The guy parked next to me had his window down and asked about the kinesiology tape on my legs. It gets so much attention and is a man magnet!

“Is that a tattoo?!” he asked.

“No. It’s therapy tape,” I said. Then I explained what it does.

“Oh, I was gonna say that I can’t believe you would get a tattoo like that. If I had legs like you, I would show them off.”

Whoa, there! Here we go haha.

Keep in mind that I am cracking up the ENTIRE time of this conversation. I wish I had a film crew with me!

“What do you do for your legs?”

“I run.”

“I can see. I don’t run. I just lift.”

“How much do you lift?”

He said it but I could not follow. I had no clue what he was talking about.

“I have no idea what you said,” I laughed.

“Do you run marathons?”

“No. I am not a professional! My first marathon is in April in Long Branch. Half marathons are my longest race.”

“I don’t know. For all I know I could be talking to a f#$%#ing famous runner!”

I continue laughing, really loud.

“Is your boyfriend or husband a runner?”

I laugh so loud that China can hear me.

“Do you date only runners?"

“I prefer runners but it would be awesome if I dated a pro….or a celebrity.” I paused. “Are you trying to figure out if I am single?"

“Well, what about your boyfriend or husband?”

“Oh my goodness!"

“I am sorry for cursing. I hope that didn’t offend you.”

I actually did not realize he cursed, but I didn’t say that I didn’t notice. I like a man who is cognizant of his language and tries to be gentlemanly!

“Well, I don’t curse…..”

“Oh I’m so sorry! I won’t curse anymore. Just for you."

I laugh some more.

“You don’t need to curse. Don’t. Stay the way you are.”

Hmmm…smooth talker.

Then we talked about what we do for work. He is an engineer.

“Where are you going now?”

“To the gym!”

“Oh, I am going to go to Signature (another gym) to get a protein shake.”

We talked about protein shakes. Ey, don’t judge me.

Then we talked about where we live. Of course he was wondering if I ever got shot or mugged, considering I live in one of the most dangerous cities in the US, but I love it here. “Danga” is my middle name.  Scandalous is my first. ;)

“I am moving though,” I said.

“Move in with me!”

“Wow! You are very forward!”

“I’m sorry. I can’t help it.”

I keep laughing. I didn’t know what else to say!

He gave me his number and said he hopes to hear from me so we can go out one day.

 

I do not know how I feel about this. I only saw him from his torso up. He wore a hoodie. He is not who I would consider as a potential. I was turned off by his forward approach, especially with that boyfriend/husband question. I HATE when guys ask that! Just say you are digging me and want to take me out! Men are such wimps. I can understand why though. I gave the poor guy a hard time haha all I did was laugh! I was caught off guard and found it funny that my tape was the bait. It sure works! He had a firm handshake though. I like a man who means it!

I thought it was so funny that he asked if I would date a non-runner since “runners tend to date other runners”. Actually, yes. I prefer to date my own breed. Running is a big part of my life and I would like to share that with someone who has the same interest. I know I am being very rigid by wanting to date a runner. If he does not run, then he must have some sort of athletic hobby and be in shape. Fitness is a non-negotiable quality in a man. That, and the guy must be not shady. It’s all I ask!

I should suggest a running date with this guy. He better be faster than me!

I don’t know if I will contact this guy. I wasn’t feeling it. His game was terrible, but I thought the conversation was funny because of his lack of game. I give him credit though. It is not easy. Should I give him a chance? If I do, I don’t want him thinking I am leading him on if I end up not liking him. I don’t feel any attraction toward him. Looks are not the only thing, but I feel like this guy would fit well in the friend zone.

To date, or not to date? That is the question.

 

Keepin’ it real,

Realist

And finally, a positive development...

Wait a minute now, I think things just got a little bit more interesting.

I had a routine lunch with The Journalist today. Great conversation, lots of laughter, as usual. Walking back to the office, he made note that after his contract ends at the end of the month, we won't have these lunches anymore. "I'll miss you!" he said. "Would you like to hang out again anyway?"

"Yes, I'd like that!" I said. When I got back to my desk, I sent him my personal email and cell phone number.

It was a really subtle moment--kind of came and went like a whisper. But I got happier about it as the day went on. I've really enjoyed spending time with this guy, and lately that little spark has been there in his little touches when he talks to me (and I don't mean dry static sparks! bah dum bum!). I'm glad he finally manned up and went for it. I like the way this is going now. Hopefully I won't have to wait another month again before anything new happens!

Trying to stay positive,
Skeptic

Touch me once, touch me twice

The journalist has settled into role of my work husband. Which is fine--we all know how the work-husband relationships work.

But.... he is also quite a touchy guy. He touches me on the arm or hand when he talks to me frequently. When he talks to me, he often starts out talking to me over the cubicle wall, but then moves around to be next to me at my desk. he ALWAYS compliments something that I'm wearing--jewelry, scarf, outfit, etc. Is he just a chronic flirt? Is he genuinely coming on to me? It's things like these that made me convinced he had a crush on me to begin with, but I wouldn't be surprised if he acted that way with a lot of girls.

To add to the puzzle, our work-marriage is headed for an impasse. He is a contractor, and his contract is up at the end of the year, so he's been job hunting. I also just found out that my team will be changing offices in January, so I'll be in a different location, anyway. After the time he told me about his date, I decided he is firmly in friend territory until he suggests otherwise, since I'm not going to pursue the un-pursue-able. But...... is it do or die time now? Even though he's a friend, and even though it may mean nothing, every time he touches me on the arm I get that kind of electric feeling and wind up daydreaming for the rest of the day. Then again..... I'm also (nearly at the same time!) daydreaming about the Great Dane. Clearly I'm in a foggy state of mind, replaying the old "hits," and probably I just want *some*one in my life and these two guys are just conveniently top of mind. But I just can't tell what to do here! I hate trying to interpret guy actions. Someone just tell me what he wants. Or better yet, HE SHOULD just tell me what he wants. Ugh.

Lunch with the Journalist tomorrow. I don't anticipate anything unusual happening, but I feel it necessary to bring up the fact that our lunches will soon come to an end.

Trying to stay positive,
Skeptic

Dead-end?

I sent the Great Dane an email just to say hello, asking how things are going. He wants to Skype soon! Is it bad that I'm kind of geeked about it? *sigh*

I need to find someone new to go out with. Someone in the country, ideally.

Trying to stay positive,
Skeptic